[ She bites at her lip and her tongue and the heel of her palm, trying to stifle her tears back. She's already cried about this, she's already let it out—she needs to get herself together. It's with the scaled knuckle of her thumb pressing between her teeth and her breath slow through her nostrils that she forces herself to listen to Yuya. Her sharp vision is distorted by water; she blinks through tears, and forces herself to breathe.

She hates feeling like this.

There's moments, seconds, a taffy-pull stretch of silence from Yuya's last word to her first; her face is flushed, and her heart beats like a damaged clock, too loud and too hard against her ribs. She exhales. She closes her eyes.

Explanations and apologies clog her throat as thick as her tears; there's too much to say. ]

I...

[ In, and out; she forces her hands to rest on her knees. She keeps her eyes closed. She wishes, more than anything, that she could reach over for Yuya's hand, to lean against his shoulder when she still feels so close to crumbling, but her body burns too hot. What tears still escape past her lashes can't even reach her chin before they vanish into mist. She doesn't want to hurt him... ]

I'm sorry, Yuya... I never...

[ A breath, claws pressing against her kneecaps. ]

I know I've messed up a lot. I've done a lot of things wrong. You've gotten the worst of me... I never meant to be... like that. Patronizing.

[ Her eyes slit open a little; she glances at Yuya, but she can't make out his expression at all, vision blurred by wetness. ]

We're all suffering, and we don't agree about the right way to fight it, but... it's not because I don't believe in you, Yuya.